Divine Graces offering to me in India.

I have been in India for 3 weeks and it has been such a beautiful journey. I can not say that i saw the beauty in every moment at the time but now that it is all wrapping up i have found a new perspective and i am grateful for every moment, the tears, the joy, the confusion, the trust, the love, even the anger.

Before i left for India i thought i would be blogging as i went along my journey. Now it is my last day and this is my first post. I realized if i had been blogging the whole time you would have been reading about my perspective on every human emotion because the last 3 weeks has been a buffet of every emotion on the menu. Some would call it a "roller coaster" but i believe that ALL our emotion are just colors for the paintings of our lives. We are always in the "pursuit of happiness" and are often thought that anger and sadness are bad and should be avoided. If we never felt sadness how would we know what happiness was. If we never knew darkness we would not know light in the same way, we need contrast and opposites in order to have perspective.

So how do we allow our feeling and emotion to have their time and space with out judgment? I have found that remembering nothing is permanent helps.

As i went through my emotional waves i just kept telling my self; don't worry this even will pass. We can not get attached to our feelings, sadness or joy. The moment we become attached we are doomed for disappointment and self judgment. This rule goes for all emotions including joy and happiness.

I am learning to love all my emotions; to know that non of them are permanent the same way my life is not permanent. But i am finding that the only way to not be ruled by my emotions is to not take them personally and not get attached to them. They will come and go the same way the waves of the ocean flow. If we allow them to move without judgment we will see that they are our greatest teaches. We all have a Divine teacher within us but we don't always know how to listen. Be still and quite with your emotion and you will see they are just trying to show you a new direction.
If you do not have a good sense of self awareness and deep trust then your emotions will rule you. You will act and react to them, only causing more pain and suffering. Just be still with them, listen, allow and love them but don't do any thing, they will pass, you will see.

I could see my journey to India in so many different lights, but because of my practice and deepening of self i have the blessing to see the beauty in it and the amazing lesson Divine Mother wanted to share with me when i was here. Be still, don't react, love even the sadness because in that moment of pure love for all that IS Divine Grace will be there waiting for you and ready to help you through.
Remember your not alone and nothing is permanent!

Om Shanti, Love and Light from India!

Take a moment in passing.

I was sitting at Urth cafe the other day, as I watched a homeless women go around asking people for money. Everyone said no; as they sat there eating eight dollar desserts and sipping fancy lattes. I thought how can ever single person reject her? I knew a least one person must have had a dollar in their pockets and what’s a dollar when you’re eating at one of the most overpriced coffee shops in LA? It was not only denying her a dollar but denying her existence.

At first my judgment came up. I was disgusted and disheartened by the scene, but as I watched them and myself I realized that if I was going to judge their actions I was really no different than them. I took a few deep breaths and focused back on my heart - this allowed me to see the scene with new eyes; the eyes of my heart, not my head. I saw a bunch of humans who were simply disconnected.

They had disconnected from their hearts and consequently become desensitized. When we have the ability to say no to helping someone who is clearly in need, there is disconnect from our heart. I think we often tell ourselves stories about homeless people so that we can pass them up without feeling guilty. “He is homeless because... he is a drunk, or drug addict.” The truth is their story does not matter, what matters it that Divine Grace gave you a chance to serve and you did not honor it.

Most Yogis would agree that the only way to have all the joy and happiness we seek would be to live from our hearts. It is important to not assume you’re living from your heart because you’re a good yogi. A good way to test if you’re living from your heart is to see how you feel when you walk by a person who is clearly less fortunate then you. If your heart does not feel for them you’re not fully connected.

Imagine what this world would be like if we all felt each others' pain and suffering. I believe we would no longer allow it. We would automatically dedicate our lives to helping each other because your pain would be my pain, my hurt would be yours. If we are not feeling for each other enough to even give a dollar when it’s needed -- we cannot claim we are living form our sacred heart space. When I say FEEL, I do not mean guilt or petty, I just simple mean FEEL...FEEL as though this person was a dear friend or family member. Feel connected to them and for a moment. Understand their suffering. It does not mean it is your job to save them, just FEEL for them. Take that moment in passing to hold them in your heart and gracefully let them know their life matters.

Often we think we are living form our hearts because we are good friends, spouses or parents. It is easy to be good to the people we love; generally we get rewarded with love in return. When you live from your heart completely, there are no limitations and it is without any need of love in return. So I just ask us all to really check in with our hearts next time we pass a person who is suffering. See how your heart feels, not your head. Our head is where the stories are, where the guilt and petty commotion lives. Check your heart; see if it aches a little and feels for that human being. I am not asking you to stop your life and save the world, I am just asking that we all begin with the simple act of reconnecting to our true nature which feels for each other; family or stranger.

Start with the heart, all else will follow.

I work, live, eat and breathe in the yoga world. I watch people as they come to their practice and paths with their stories. Something brought them to yoga because often nothing else was working. They had spent all the money they could on therapy, they had gone to retreats and re-birthing workshops, they tried to drown out the story with drugs and distractions and yet their stories keep coming up.

Our stories become our identity if we are not careful. If we don't figure out a way to truly let them go they will shape our lives. No matter where we try to escape, yoga, retreats, relationships, drugs -- they will eventually catch up.

I grew up practicing yoga and have incredible parents that support me in every aspect of my evolution. I have had an amazing and "easy" life. I bow daily in deep gratitude, but this being said I still have createdstories along my path.

I recently went to a yoga retreat and the minuet I arrived my stories and ideas began to bubble up. The story this time was that I did not belong here with these "self- seeking hippies.” Before I had even met the other students I had them all pegged in a box, I knew their type, "self- help spiritual widow shoppers.” All though I felt out of place I was committed to staying because I knew I had come for something deeper, I did not come to make friends. Since I was there I figured I would at least get some good yoga time in and enjoy the beautiful retreat center.

One thing I will give myself credit for is my awareness. I am very aware of my skeptical mind and the way I judge people. I have tried to change this story of mine for years, but it was just the way things were. Plus I had "justifications" for my story…. (As we all do).

Day one was great, lots of yoga, lots of sweating, lots of breathing... just enough to quite my mind so that my heart could begin to let loose. As my heart began to let loose a softness came over it, the skepticism began to fade, the judgment began to melt and the walls dividing “them” from “me” began to drop. I let go of my self-judgment and allowed acceptance first. That's when I just watched the change happen. It was as if I was watching a movie of myself. There was no effort or trying, I just showed up for class, did the yoga and meditation and my heart did the rest. Before I knew it I found myself having deep heart felt conversations with the other students. I was hugging them and saying I love you. I went from walls up, armor on, solitude to heart melting, loving bear hugs in just two days! I was not sure how I got from A to B, but whatever it was, it worked! My story of always judging the "hippies" was over. I actually fell in love with all the people there. Something inside of me recognized them without their stories once I had dropped mine. Then it was just soul to soul, human to human, and heart to heart.

We spend too much time and effort "trying" to get over our stories. We analyze, dissect and verbalize them, telling them again and again. Seeing if we can gain new positions and perspectives. The truth is when you "try" too hard at anything you’re usually no good at it, but when you let it flow people think it’s your God given gift. Being in the flow of our hearts is everyone’s gift. It does not take effort -- it just takes an allowance.

Find something that softens your heart. For me, its yoga, meditation, dance and helping others. It does not really matter what you do as long as you do it consistently. I promise once your heart softens all else will melt away. You will no longer have to figure anything out, you will wake up one day and the story will be gone. Once your truly living in your Heart you are in the home of Grace. Grace only wants what is best for you, so if you story is not serving you -- Grace will let it go, it’s as simple as that.